I like how you gave a lot of reasons to support your evidence. I think you spoke in a good clear voice. I think you should try to use more of your own words not only quotes from the book
your first example is fireflys but it does not relate to the essay. you should use less quotes. I disagree that the father decided to take the buisness trip. I also disagree with your conclusion.
I like how you gave a lot of reasons to support your evidence.
ReplyDeleteI think you spoke in a good clear voice.
I think you should try to use more of your own words not only quotes from the book
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ReplyDeletewhy fireflys?
ReplyDeleteyour first example is fireflys but it does not relate to the essay.
ReplyDeleteyou should use less quotes.
I disagree that the father decided to take the buisness trip.
I also disagree with your conclusion.
Essam, I did like your story, And how much effort you put to make it. Something that I wish for is, to show more evidence in your reasons.
ReplyDeletei like you added what you think and the quotes. i think you should work on your ending
ReplyDeleteI like your claim but why is there a firefly, and also can you speak louder please. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteI liked the explaining, but I think you need some more quotes from the story.
ReplyDeleteI like how you gave the dad's perspective and I like your evidence to support the claim, but I wish you would add more quotes.
ReplyDeleteI like how you used good words such as perspective.
ReplyDeleteI like the different perspectives
ReplyDeleteGood Job!